More about robots

Today, I was able to read half a chapter in Sally Clarkson's book The Mom Walk. I want to share a very special and challenging paragraph with you.

"When we are seeking to discipline and train our children, we are not seeking to train them as morally perfect robots. We have freedom to enjoy a free-flowing relationship with our children and to be free to love them and respond to the need of the moment with wisdom and grace from the Holy Spirit. We are seeking to give them a heart for righteousness and for loving from the very core of their hearts. Reaching our children's hearts requires us to be a student of their souls; to learn what appeals to them and understand the things that motivate them in their hearts, so that we can be effective in reaching their hearts in our desire to train them to love God."

This paragraph is preceeded by several more that approach the topic of discipline and training with grace. She (Clarkson) and I believe that no matter what rules we make as parents, by the very nature, children will come up with areas we have never conceived. No lists of rules or formulas can possibly cover all the bases. There is no manual. Although many have attempted to provide various ways of training, there is no one set formula that will work. Issues such as gender, personality, disorders, temperaments, stress, hormones, timing, age, and environment, just to name a few, must be considered.

Many times I have thought and even said aloud to Scott, "I wish I had a manual for this job." Parenting is hard. What Clarkson is saying in this chapter is that we must know, be students of, our children. We need to be able to relate to them and not tower over them with a long list of rules and regulations, overlooking their heart and situation. Grace is needed in parenting. Laws are not effective. We are free to love, and we should.